Friday, November 5, 2010

Sunny Days...

"Be where you are: otherwise you miss your life" ~ Buddha


It's a longen today... but hopefully a gooden!!! Read on..... xxx

So very true... just being "there" in your life is just not good enough. Being present however, being in the moment and savouring and enjoying (or not, depending on the situation) and really learning from each experience and taking everything on board is how we grow in life.

Our baby boy during his "angus" impression for his school assembly the
other day! You rocked LJ!!!
I try to be present for my family always, be aware, and alert and organised more than anything... never enough time in the day LOL. But I also believe that we need to be present for our friends too, sometimes just as much as our own family. I try to pay attention to how people are, to what may be going on in their lives and affecting them as much as my own... and knowing when to just be present, yet not intrusive when a delicate moment arises.

I also try to keep track of my friends lives and happenings, and touch base with them about certain matters, check in on them when I am worried, call them up from time to time as friends do, and ask them how certain things/events/situations have panned out too. Same goes for congratulating them on happy occasions, praise them when I notice how good they look whilst on the weight loss track etc, and always offering my help and assistance when needed as well. After all, it is all part of being a good person, a great friend, and that fabulous feeling you get inside when you know you have made someones day.

Our big boy with his MOST deserved meri certificate!!!
SO proud of you buddy- keep up the good work!
I also ALWAYS make the effort to say hello, even sometimes going out of my way to make a concerted effort... even when I know I am being avoided on purpose. I also love to smile at people... regardless of what may be happening in my life, I ALWAYS try to put a smile on my face and share my affection and effort. Who knows... you may the only person all day who smiles at one person, and that may just be enough to keep their spirits up, their head held high and make them feel even the tiniest bit special. A smile is truly worth it's weight in gold!!!

And I do all this knowing full well that 95% of the time, none of it will ever be reciprocated. The same time, effort, thought or expense is never spent on you as you do onto others. But just knowing that you are the better person inside, your intentions are good and your heart is always true is something I treasure and am so very proud of too.

However... having said all that, we are constantly encountering people in our lives who are out for number one, who never acknowledge you or make an effort (even in return), who make their own personal opinions of you based on "stories" and "lies" but choose to believe them as it is just easier than the truth. Some people never end up on top in life as there are always those who can see your inner beauty, sense your good nature, know your good intentions, talents, ease with making new friendships etc etc... yet also feel threatened by that too. Jealous even perhaps? Instead of trying to better themselves and strive to achieve all the things they long to have, they become hell bent on destroying you instead. Lies. Manipulation. Greed. Deception. Backstabbing. Imitation. Blame. Ridicule. Constantly criticiing behind your back. Morally devoid of any conscience or sense of right and wrong.

The good things in life.... triple choc muffins LOL
I find it hard to still believe in this day and age with so many wars, so much poverty (even on our own doorsteps), so much hardship and struggle... that these kinds of people still exist. And worse still, there seems to be more and more of them too. And how can people still choose the dark side over good? Do they have no morals, ethics or conscience? How do they sleep at night knowing in their hearts all the dark they bring? This is a time when people should be pulling together, sheltering those who are weak, boosting and strengthing those who deserve it, and shunning those that bring ill will and mean harm.

When we went through the heartache and loss of losing our second daughter Lola midterm, we experienced this hurt first hand unfortunately. We were shunned, ignored, avoided, talked about, criticized, and basically left out in the cold. I have honestly never felt more alone in my whole life, and I have a few "good" life experiences to compare it to as well. People even refused to acknowledge that it even happened, even members of our own family- even after having an autopsy done on our poor precious angel, and receiving her ashes via a post bag (yes... an ordinary post bag in the mail!!), they refuse to admit the event. And still to this day, there are those that continue to down play it all saying things like other people had it much worse than you, you were "lucky" (my favourite!!) and it was "for the best". Something no parent in mourning ever wants to hear! Even today... it makes me sick inside to hear all these not very well aimed comments. And worst of all... it is REALLY really hurtful :(

So I say to you now... smile! It is not hard, it's not going to cost you anything, and you may just make someones day! There is not enough of it going around nowadays. And the next time you go to tell "stories" about someone or criticize, or ridicule and or just plain be nasty... please try to stop and think about your actions. Think about how you'd feel if you were in that person's situation, and the shoe was on the other foot. Think. Act. Commit.

As you can probably tell from my very long winded post today and the very nature of the subject, I am having a bit of a dark day... BUT... I am going to continue to smile regardless!! Share the affection and hopefully it will become infectious! AND I am going to post "HAPPY PICS" on here today to try lighten my day too. Happy days xxx

xox K

2 comments:

  1. thank you for sharing your thoughts. It is hard to smile when your day is awful, but isn't it great when someone responds with another smile?

    I'm really sorry you've had such a dreadful loss, and to have it go unacknowledged is terrible! :(

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  2. Aww thankyou for your kind words! I must admit that I nearly deleted this post due to the "darkish" and very personal nature of it all, but have been so amazingly overwhelmed by the response!

    Sometimes I guess it is a good thing to put it all out there and get people thinking about things... and it never hurts to smile!!

    xxx K

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